Vintage bras were a sin against tit-kind.

I never met my maternal great grandmother. But from what I heard, she was awesome. And from what history says, she was probably awesome because she went through a lot of hard times – like The Great Depression, little food, tight funds, and shitty bras…? Yes. You heard me. There’s a lot of stuff our lady ancestors had to deal with while playing Suzy Seamstress and Connie Cook. And while.. Read More

Too bad weightlessness day isn’t real :/

Ah… this story would have been so cool if it were true. The Snopes debunked prank claimed that for “five minutes on January 4th”, we’d all experience partial weightlessness because of “planetary alignment”. The idea was that the phenomenon would ensue due to the combined gravitational forces of “Pluto moving behind Jupiter”. Aside from the fact that Pluto’s not a planet, so we don’t get to say it’s part of.. Read More

The silver lining of silver bells season

Winter has never been my favorite. Having lived in a region with seasonal changes four times a year, you’d think I would have gotten used to the ephemeral nature of warm, beautiful, summer by now. Alas, the Hawaiian half of me is so strong that a yearly freeze will always be my kryptonite. This year, being my second winter sans firewatwer or pills to numb the hatred of not-warm weather,.. Read More


Because I'm 200 years old, apparently. #sweetdreams A photo posted by Ashley (@missashleypants) on Dec 12, 2014 at 5:40pm PST You know, I’m not even trying to fight it or hide it anymore. Every Most Some nights, lately, I end up getting in bed around 9 or 10. Even though I end up tossing and turning or working and reading, that’s what I do. And this week, that moved up.. Read More

Best way to battle Christmas = laying down weapons.

Christmas at my house has generally meant putting the “fun” in “dysfunctional”. Yes, a bit cliche – but only if you’re being sarcastic. And a few holidays ago, I might have told you that’s exactly what I meant as well. But we’ve been doing pretty well the past couple of years. Oh, we’re still dysfunctional – but it really has been kinda fun – and with less yelling. I’m not.. Read More