In Volume II of Kill Bill, Bill’s bro asks Elle: “Do you feel regret? Or relief?” There were a lot of great villains in that movie, but I think of all the villains, the obvious one – Beatrice – has to be my favorite because she harbors my two favorite other “R” qualities for not-quite-villains I like to root for: ruthlessness and revenge. I dig a character with a vendetta.. Read More
“If morphine causes euphoria, a kappa agonist causes dysphoria.” The quote comes from a hippie doctor in a recent VICE article. And he’s referencing salvia. You may’ve heard of this stuff from when Hannah Montana smoked it a while ago and then subsequently morphed herself and her crew into real-time furry cabaret carnival in concert. I’d heard about salvia a bit earlier – in college – when a friend tried.. Read More
Nope. Can’t do it. Okay, maybe I’ll try one more ti–… NOPE. I’m sorry! I’m sorry. I gave it my all. Really. I tried several months ago. And then I tried again last night. And then I tried again today when VICE posted this thing synchronistically about it, but I just can’t. I can’t… with ASMR. And this one might just be the worst I’ve heard yet. Go on, try.. Read More
What sorcery is THIS? I’ll let you guess via the following little quiz: 1. A high tech tool for sexy time. 2. A replica for Dubai’s next unnecessary giant revolving lounge bar at the top of a towering building that’s high enough to get an excellent view of the impoverished masses starving below as they build the next one. 3. A toy microphone collaboratively created by Fisher Price and Apple… Read More
What’s Italian, metallic, and has three arms? If you guessed “a transformer Ferrari in its transitional stages of sexy car to tower sized robot, like a transgender betwixt top and bottom surgeries”… you… might be right. And I totally applaud you for thinking outside the box. But just for today, we’re going to go ahead acknowledge someone else who thought outside the box – by making life-sized boxes for the.. Read More
I’m going Chris Crocker over here with mah British stories. Although I love, love, love Steve Carrell, Rainn Wilson, and whoever else is in the American version of “The Office”, I have to jump on the British hipster bandwagon (is that ironic? That a “hipster bandwagon” is something that exists now?) and admit: the American version cannot touch the British version. “Leave Brit T.V. aloooone!!!1” I remember seeing the O.G… Read More
I have to confess. I tried listening to an “Increase your I.Q.” guided hypnosis last night. And when I didn’t wake up any smarter, I had to ask myself: Is it because I’m hopeless? Or because my ipod died after I wasn’t intelligent enough to think about charging it before bed? Or maybe that I’m doing everything except what people who wanna be smarter hafta actively do? My answer came.. Read More
About a year ago, I went to see Russell Brand perform live. It was about two hours of non-stop awesomery lighting up the stage. I hate sitting in any kind of theater for a prolonged period of time, but the next-level content of the jokes made time seem to stop altogether. I only had to get up once or twice to stretch. The rest of the duration, I was lost.. Read More
I’m not yet prepared to watch The Walking Dead premiere yet. So, no spoilers, thx. When I like a show such as this one, I typically wait, save up all the episodes, and then (instead of taking a holiday – or even weekly weekend off like most normal folk) I allot a personal holiday at home for binging on that show. Dark as “Dead” might be, it’s easier to not.. Read More
I like Quora. I signed up exactly one point one million years ago and never used it because I was afraid people would comment reply telling me what an idiot I am and what right do I have to have an opinion. However, as I enter my golden years and start seeking out a nice nursing home in which to slowly to die, I feel it’s time to draw on.. Read More