I’m in love with a corpulent Ukrainian

“Can I have the breast pillow?” Typical question to ask. If you’re a chick. And if you’re walking into the back of Massage Envy while inquiring about supportive accessories that’ll make your lady accessories comfortable while laying down during your session (they aren’t huge, but I can’t relax the backs of my shoulders if my chesticles are vexed). A less typical reply? The one that followed, issued by my portly.. Read More

Keep cruisin’ (or whatever transport metaphor for life you like.)

What’s your dream life you’re not living right now? Is it like mine? Living in luxury with a view of the ocean? That life is typically merely met only in either our daydreams or on nightly delta waves. But not for one woman. She’s living that life – not on delta pillow waves or Delta plane waves but on boat ridden waves of the actual ocean – compliments of Crystal.. Read More

They see me scowlin’…they mandatin’

Ever been told “you should smile” – by anyone? Once upon a time, it was indirectly said to me – by a boss I had. He sent me an article about how it “takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile”. Not one to miss a chance to spar in my favorite game of passive aggression, I replied, “Great article! I was hoping they’d add this other related.. Read More