When a friend posted this…

… I did what’s common for people like me: try to guess what they said, give up on guessing what they said, decide what I’d choose to eat at McD’s if forced to, and not read the article at all before commenting exactly that list to said friend. Said comment list went something like this:

Haven’t read it yet – but these are the 5 I’d be willing to eat from there, personally, if I had to:

1.) Two napkins.
2.) Spork wrapper.
3.) Ronald McDonald’s ‘fro.
4.) Toilet paper in the loo.
5.) Cashier’s visor.

K. Now I’ll see what huff had to say…

Bet it’s identical to my list!

Indeed, I went on to browse the actual article after listing the only acceptable edibles I could think of inside a fast food establishment such as McD’s, and – of course – they tried their hardest; burger with a salad. Nuggets… with a salad. Oatmeal… minus the brown sugar. These’re great jumping off points – jumping off a building, that is. I get that you’re trying to make a consolation prize out of salad by throwing in grease battered patties betwixt semispherical bread bits, but… why? To make it a full meal? Then toss in another salad if you’re forced to toss McClown’s salad by contributing to its power as pacman o’ money, I thought. But better than my original thought is: let’s get rid of the faux food chain altogether. Especially after one nutritionist admitted, “I wouldn’t worry about nutrition right now because it’s not in the cards. I’d rather get a healthy meal I could savor later, and something quick and enjoyable now.” That’s not bad – for the context of the article – but someone in the comments below showed the problem with the world by head-nodding and saying she “lives in the real world.”

You wanna know what the real world is, my friend? And the 150 likers? The real world is where a lotta impoverished people can’t afford the Natch-Grocer or Whole Foods or Wegmans every week – or any week. In fact, they probably don’t even know the deets of a healthy diet because health was never emphasized for them coming up in life. They’re just trying to survive, payday to payday. So, they do the drive-thru frequently or get free food ‘cause they slave under the golden arches nine to five themselves, only ever doing a big shop for processed affordable junk at Food 4 Less (or wherever’s cheaper ‘cause they food’s past the sell-by and they make ya bag your own shiz) when their check finally arrives. Shitty ass fast food isn’t some last resort “right now” for a good majority of living human beings; most don’t acquiesce just because a usual-post yoga green drink or quinoa dish isn’t “in the cards”. Often, it’s the only hand they’ve got. It’s the only option because it’s cheap, proximate, and they can survive off’a it – that is, until they perish from one of the plethora of illnesses it inevitably induces. That’s one big bit of “real world”, my friend.

And we’re so lucky if our addresses are far from it. Or that we have addresses.

Some of us have forgotten that.

Especially if an article’s focus is on being road-trip hungry, versus roaches-and-almost-homeless hungry.

#MediaPriorities #DownWithMcDouchery #EducateAndFeedThePoorRealFood