I really wanted to finish that Sawyer interview, like I said I would.
Because I want to really understand.
And it’s not just ’cause I’m some empathetic saint who cares about things I can’t immediately relate to. No. This is pure full swing PMS talking right now. I want – nay – need to know why anyone would want to enter into this contract of crazy with their own body. And for what? To look fabulous in a skirt? To have men turn all doe eyed and dumb (until you make the mistake of forking them)? To get that I-should-be-wearing-a-cape-and-underwear-over-tights feeling you get after leaving the salon freshly platinum? Alright, maybe there’s some fun in being female. But I bet it’s more fun owning a man monument.
Either way, I just couldn’t finish the Bruce Jenner interview. But (and if you’ve read the previous blog on the topic, you’ll already know this) it wasn’t cuzza him. It was because of that journalist with the Zack Morris the-college-years coif prodding the poor man with a passive aggressive emotional fire poker the whole time. I tried, god help me, but finally I gave up. Which sucks, because I’ve got plenty of pals in the LGBT community whose plight I’d like to learn about without actually having to pose some awkward curiosity induced inquiry-string in the middle of dinner. Plus, it’s not even that I care whether you go in the loo with the skirty silhouette or not. Or what you do in there. What I wanna know is what you want me to know – that stuff that most people don’t take into consideration and should (like what pronoun you want or other rando social graces that are easy to confuse when trans is only now becoming more recognized and taken seriously)
And then, just like it always does, SuperSoul came to the rescue:
I dunno who Janet Mock is on a fame level (I think she got notoriety because of publicly speaking out on the whole gender jumping thing), but when I caught part of this interview she did with the talk show czar, I was floored. First, because I didn’t even know she was retrospectively someone’s son with those amazing cheekbones and perfect hair (some men have it all; even chick features). But secondly, because she was so seamlessly female in the way she carried herself. Not at all exaggerated or dramatic. Just a power bish, sitting there and exuding all this confidence and openness with zero false airs about her. The kinda qualities I hope Jenner comes to acquire after his transition’s where he wants it to be. But it may take time and hard work, because Janet’s were hard won. Mock was mocked all through school – in addition to being pressured to act masculine by parents, taunted by “smear the queer” football games, and punished for acting feminine.
But two great things happened in Janet’s young life. The first was making a friend called Wendi who was going through the same thing, accepted her for what she was, and could empathize. Friends. Something we all need – whatever our “I feel different” insecurities may be – we need to fux with folk we can identify with. The second thing? Sheer bravery. Speaking out about trans in adulthood wasn’t Janet’s first rodeo. Back in high school, she opted to shake off the haters supercharged epilepsy style when she showed up for the school year, in full chick regalia, stepped on the stage as class treasurer and said confidently, “Hi. I’m Janet.” (instead’a Charles – her then-gov’ment name).
As for Bruce? Well, he too has done the “bravery” bit – coming out all, “here I am, bishes” to the world – not to mention setting a great example for on the fence should-I-hide-myself kids like formerly-Charles himself was doing before meeting also-trans Wendi. As for the friend thing, though, it may be tougher for Bruce. I mean, sure, being famous ‘n all, it shouldn’t be tough to network anywhere – including within the rainbow neighborhood. But being famous ‘n all, it also means a lotta fake people pretending to give a shit about you ‘cause of what you can provide. Until you’re suddenly shunned cuzza some tabloid lie or what the rest of the KardashiKlan is doing or whatever. And everyone evaporates in a cloud of ninja smoke.
Even though I’ll never understand why anyone would voluntarily give up sweet phallic sanity (#penisenvy) to become psychotic ’cause they hafta eat crazy pills to remain female, I do now have a better sense of the identity mindset now. And I’m glad I watched this Oprah thing instead of finishing that shitty Sawyer interview. This one actually provided a bigger picture perspective and better understanding by being compassionate instead’a callous in its line of questioning.
Bruce: I wish you continued courage and some real-ass ride or die friends.
And even though I’m shitty at being butch, I also kinda wish we could just swap sexes like lego blocks.