Okay, no, she didn’t. It’s seaweed. I hope. Anyway, apologies – that was a crude and false pretense to get you to come here.
But first – before you turn away in disappointment, yes – that is her, just a few humans larger in weight than when she filmed “The Girl Next Door” or “My Sassy Girl” or all those movies with “Girl” in it, where she’s walking in slow motion and has a tight butt:
You see, as a female, I have a sick need to make myself feel better about my self image. Don’t take that as a “woe as me” thing. Many of us females do it. I’m just among the few who admit to it. We call it “thinspiration”. And sometimes we do it by looking at anorexic models (See my “Picture Me” blog for further reference.)
But another fabulous way of doing this, is by checking out the actresses our ex boyfriends all wanted to cover in hot chocolate sauce and … well…probably prematurely ejaculate over.
But nonetheless – we want to see them get FAT.
So that’s what I do. Try it! Google search your favey love-to-hate betch plus the word “fat”, and see what you get. (Word of warning, don’t try it with Gwyneth Paltrow or Miss Fox or the obvious ones. You’ll just end up getting “Shallow Hal” or fake photoshop shit and crying into a bucket of Ben and Jerry – the two men with which you’ll share your last threesome ever, as your ass exponentially expands)
But, other than than, it’s *another* kind of thinspiration that motivates us toward “Oh no… we don’t want to look like THAT”. But, simultaneously, it sometimes carries the dual delight of a few fun comments left by anonymous internet passersby. Or is it passerbyes? I feel like that word should have an “s” on the end.
In any case, I digress. So I give you this gift of gold – (apologies for the fuzziness):
Don’t get me wrong. Usually male douche-baggery doesn’t make me laugh. But for some reason today, I found the caveman thought processes of this particular Y chromosome bearer to serve its purpose in the comic relief portion of my day, so I had to share it with you all.
xoxo
<3~A