I think I’ve yes-anded the idea of “bookstore flirting before”.
But in past articles, my suggestions have consisted of ideas about how to create a latte-meets-literature-establishment. And while I still like that idea (I’ll be the first to go if someone else makes it), I still am also fond of the original concept of this becoming a social norm. People making book buying the new happy hour of flirting; instead of buying me something to dull my mind – you buy me something to stimulate it.
“I bought that bish some words. Bishes love words.”
I even like the idea of it becoming more than just akin to getting your cocktails funded – and more of a pre-screening dating kindofa thing. Because, usually, when you’re in a bar, getting your drink bought can happen one of a couple ways. Someone is just being nice (or doesn’t wanna get rejected face to face), so he (we’re going with that pronoun for now #sexism) buys your drink for you from far away. You look to where the bartender is pointing to see someone waving in a typical “Yes, it was me” gesture, to which you wave-reply as a thank you. Now in a bar, you might leave it at that because you A.) Also don’t want to walk up to do face to face stuff and potentially embarrass yourself B.) Aren’t digging him that much C.) Are too lazy/don’t wanna lose your seat D.) Believe you have nothing in common with him via judgmental glace beyond an affinity for gin.
But what if you knew you did know you shared something in common?
Like books?
My vision for lit-flirting (that’s what I’m calling this; just go with it) includes not just buying the book for the other person – but kinda making it interactive. You know how people say “Oh, we’re talking” when they refer to someone new in their life? Except, if you were to look at their text log, it’d be nothing but “LOLs” and “Ya’s” and maybe a few quasi-nudes? Well, if you asked ‘em to read the same thing with you, you could actually “be talking” as you both read it separately simultaneously, and discussed it subsequently. The nice thing about this is that, first, it’s almost certain to cost no more than the dinner bill you’d’ve had to foot had you done a typical date. Also, it’d weed out the people with invisible Wrong Way signs plastered to their foreheads more quickly because you learn a shiz ton more about someone by asking them what they thought about a Poe poem or a verse in the Bhagavad Gita than by trying to come up with icebreaker topics as she picks over an overpriced salad and tries not to glance at her iphone. And finally, by being willing to match whatever book the other person’s reading, it shows not only that you’re open minded enough to read something random, but that you must really have been struck by her or him if you were willing to both finance and mentally digest poorly written pop culture BDSM or commit to sitting through Ulysses.
Yeah.
No one’s worth Ulysses.