Those stories about moms lifting cars off kids get referenced all the time.
You’ll hear them especially when people want to support a mind-over-matter argument. But in these mother truck lifters, there’s a genetic urge backing it, right? I mean, I always thought it was like our brain jumps in, all, “That’s mine! I made that creature meant to carry on my legacy via the little blueprint helixes I made from copies of my own. It can’t die! It’s Hulk O’clock, betches!”
Not that that’s not super cool, but rescuing one of your own is a bit more expected than say… splitting open a frickin metal car with your bare hands to save a stranger who’s about to become car-becue meat. But that’s exactly what happened when a dude in a Trailblazer (fantastic name for foreshadowing here), realized his brakes had malfunctioned at 65 miles per hour. As flames poured forth from underneath the SUV and smoke billowed into the interior, he pulled over.
Like any frantic man in a similar sitch, he reached for the doors – only to realize the electric locks and windows had also bugged out in the process. Just as his life was likely beginning to flash before the eyes that were beginning to cook in his own skull, a light broke through his melting metal coffin.
It was a man.
An angel.
A mangel.
(Fair enough. Does kinda sound like a winged dog with mange. Moving on.)
Indeed, this chuck Norris angel-man called Bob Renning had witnessed the plight of the other driver in time to stop when he did. So deeply committed was Bob to saving the stranger that he turned his own biceps into jaws of life, after gripping the top of the door frame and pressing all his testoster-strength into the side which bent, folded, thusly shattering the effing window.
And my mind.
Naturally, some of the first comments I see on this are “Oh… the metal was hot enough for him to bend it. It wasn’t superstrength.” Are we effing kidding me with this shiz? This is a fckking funeral pyre – not some obstinate pickle jar lid that got tight in the fridge, you pool of douche. Would you touch lava metal with your bare ass fingers? For some rando?
Thus, I feel like we should give this guy a metal.
No – I do mean metal.
An actual medal made of the metal he fckking bossed into submish.