Ah… Pre-Spring Season. Allergies. Rain. Flowers budding…The smell of the Lenten Catholics lording their religion over you.
Pardon the Pun.
Them: “What are *you* giving up for lent?”
(Translation)~ “I’m allegedly Catholic! And even though I know that you aren’t, I’m going to rub in your face that I’m giving up something I enjoy. And while it’s supposed to be an altruistic self denial in the name of ‘God’, I’ll probably just use it as an excuse to give up the food that’s been continuing to make my ass fat.”
Me (if I’m being polite): “Nothing. while I ascribe to a higher power, I don’t follow the same traditions you do.”
Them: “Oh.. (giving the judgmental scanning look down and back up to make eye contact again)… well I’m giving up my favorite vice – Starbucks Frappuccinos.”
(Translation – especially if they’re fat): “While I want to look like Frappuccuinos are my biggest and only vice, I’m planning on trying to plan on trying to give up all of the gluttonous calorie loaded closet food I normally eat in *addition* to said Fraps. But I’ll probably only give up the Fraps. For like – a week. Maybe. Probably not.”
Me: “Ah! God is awesome isn’t He? I mean it’s truly awesome to know that when Spring comes around, the ‘Deity Diet’ can pick up where your failed New Year’s resolution left off”
SPEAKING of Diet De Dios, I can’t help but put the Ash in Ash Wednesday by giving you my latest AshArt:
xoxo
<3~A