“May I have a key to your restroom?” I asked this to the Shell clerk one day en route to a run in the park, while clad in Puma jogging tights. “It’s outside,” he responded. To my vagina. (“That’s two floors above where you’re at, dear.”) He didn’t even try to avert his eyes. It was almost like it was deliberate. Now, while the man in that little IRL anecdote.. Read More
Why birth control makes you crazy
This just in from science: Taking birth control can make you crazy. Because it’s got extra of what makes you a woman in it. No, seriously. I’m on board with this. And hear me out. Think about it: as beaver bearing humanoids, we’re already destined for the genetic predisposition toward mental illness to begin with. That’s just our birthright. Our karmic reward for eating the serpent’s Granny Smith. I’m not.. Read More
Yes, being sexist can be funny – if you are.
“As a woman, I endorse this,” I told my newest massage therapist. He was, of course, in the middle of describing to me the “hot versus crazy” x/y axes chart used to identify dateable women as he unleashed the week’s tension from my suboccipital lobe. I hadn’t heard of this one yet, so I made a point to come home and promptly look it up on Youtube after our session.. Read More