Battering roommates for a breakfast of baked goods

Chips ahoy! Set sail for hell! Because that’s just where you might be speed boating to if you’re as unlucky as this 49 year old lady who got caught by her 23 year old roomie with an open package of sweet snacks in the A.M. Upon entering the kitchen they shared, the dude with whom she lived observed the savory forensic evidence – an opened cookie container with three of.. Read More

From Russia with “love entertainment”: banning backsides backfires

I’ve always loved reverse psychology. People want what they’re told they can’t have. And you can totally use this to your advantage, if you’re smart. Which is why I don’t get why – if you’re a government who doesn’t want people to ingest a drug or sexercise a certain way – why you’d make that thing illegal. We’re little kids imprisoned in adult bodies. If you hide the cookies in.. Read More

Signs of the Zuckpocalypse

It was a dark and foreboding morning. Rain gently began to fall. But the battleship grey skies above us weren’t even a sufficiently ominous backdrop for what to was transpire next. As the hardworking nine to fivers shuffled mindlessly from their homes in time to sit in the drive through while awaiting their morning adrenaline needle to the heart in the form of a steaming Venti elixir, they reached for.. Read More