Reluctantly did I watch this thing today:
Kinda obvi: Dress like a whore, get treated like a whore, die alone like a whore.
But there’s more than meets the eyeliner here – because this is one of those things where as a chick, you have to meet your makeup halfway and consider the medium you’re using.
First of all, people forget that who you are IRL is not who (or what) other people see on some dating website. So you have to be prepared for the fact that their fantasy about you might not translate from that medium into 3D. Think about when you post a picture: first, it’s a still photo (not video), second you’re posing at your best angle, and third let’s assume you’re wearing lots of makeup. That’s like three whole filters of non-reality you’ve got going against you before you even meet Prince Tinder. It’s a lot to live up to. Especially if you’re mind’s already spiraling into “how will I keep the illusion going long enough to trap him into a marriage?” because then your insecurities will burn through in your body language and the makeup only exacerbates – not adds – to that.
Some insist women should go “au natural” or at least mo’ natural.
Nobody wants to arrive on a blind date to meet Batman’s rival.
That’s the kinda blind date where if you were actually blind, it’d be easier.
But if you’re a chick who’s gonna be totally insecure wondering if all her blemishes are showing because she went nakey-faced, then that’s almost as bad as taking an hour to look like Nicki Minaj everywhere you go. And that’s where the “meeting it halfway” thing comes in. Whatever you wear, however you wear it – make it an extension and augmentation of who you actually are. Not a definition of it. Yet, it’s hard to tell any ladies living in lipstick prisons that they’ve gotta work it from the inside out. And that’s hard for two reasons:
1. Beauty Ads distract us from believing that can possibly be true.
2. Our society te-…
Wait.
OMG, is that Gwen in that ad?! What mascara is that that’s on top of her fake lashes that aren’t even actually L’oreal but I’ll still buy because I have an unhealthy attraction to my pop idols and delusions of grandeur that I can look like them with a tube of tar?!
Uh… WANT!
And here’s one last fun fact before we part ways: Gwen keeps wearing red lipstick e’ry damn day because Gavin loves her better with it on. See what I mean? You date in a mask, he thinks you look “smoookin’!”, and then you’re Jim Carrey style stuck with it decades later after you’ve been sentenced to bearing his children. And last name.
Like I said…
Lipstick prison.