So, my buddy Richard used to tell me how he had those fleeting moments where he’d start to wonder “what if I’m in my own Truman show? And everyone’s watching me?” He’d usually get the feeling when something strange would happen here in reality.
Neo: “There’s a glitch in the Matrix!!!!1”
Tech Support: “I see. Have you tried turning it off and on again?”
Like, if it’d be raining as he drove, and then then rain would pause for a second – supplanted by sunshine, and then it’d start up torrentially again in like four seconds.
I had a similar series of thoughts the other day.
As I sat at the benches of the local marsh, trying to quiet my mind, the exact opposite happened. Like always. While laying back supine and staring up at the nearly cloudless sky, it was beautiful, but somehow troubling. I mean, when you can see the curve of the earth and the horizon and everything, it doesn’t matter that you haven’t traveled anywhere but your own little clump of clay people sequestered off and called “U.S.A.”.
I still, suddenly, had the sensation that I was trapped in a snow globe of rotating seasons.
Then I started to wonder, what if it’s true?
What if – not just my buddy Richard – but ALL of us are part of a massive Truman show?
And all the astronauts and governments and space races are staged? And Neil Armstrong and Neil DeGrasse Tyson and Sagan and Kaku and everyone contemplating the cosmos and claiming to blast off to them in a behemoth shuttle … were all just paid actors?
Or, or… what if space isn’t an infinite vacuum?
What if it has oxygen, and we’re all being lied to?!
Dude, what if heaven’s for real and that’s where it is – just past the exosphere?
“The sun will burn you alive” my ass. I bet it’s just god’s celestial solar palace, and he’s there right now watching Friends reruns and eating leftover Chinese before his wife gets home and commandeers the remote (He totally has a wife. The gospel of Louis C.K. says so).
So, yeah. The moral of the story is that the government is just lying to us so we stay here under their oligarchy-masquerading-as-a-democracy rule until they get bored, release nerve gas, and expedite evolution by weeding out those too weak to outlive the zombies.
Not this bitch. Abandon ship! Onward and upward, man! Ready my steed!
