In grade school, if your eyes wandered to your neighbor’s desk, you were caught cheating.
But what if your wandering eyes caught a cheater? A cheating slut, that is?
Like this dude’s did?
(Fan at a game saw fellow fan’s preggo wife cheat-texting… and told him. In a note.)
This is a tough call.
Is cheating wrong? Yes. But when it comes to relationships, should we follow the TSA guidelines for possible bombers and human trafficking suspects (“If you see something, say something”)? That’s tough to say. If it’s in your face and blatant – like you just saw the chick stumbling out of the bathroom stall with another dude before canoodling up to hubby in her seat when she returned? Mayhaps. But looking into someone’s phone just because it’s out and you can feels kinda like going out of the way to peep into someone’s window just ‘cause the blinds are open.
The other factor here that’s of utmost importance is that homegirl was preggo.
While it makes the story even more scandalous and her seem even more disgusting, we dunno the whole story. Maybe the dude already knew. Like, they’re on and off and she got knocked up along the way and they’re just trying to remain amicable. Who knows? But if it’s not, that’s far worse. Because now they’ve got something bigger than the both of them to worry about – a human child. One that they have to try their hardest to not program into becoming a slutty mother to be or blissfully ignorant father one day. And that objective trumps everything else.
Daddy needs to hang around and help grow the seed he’s planted. Even though this dude has a right to know, I feel like raptor Jesus puts signs there for us (just like he sends lifeboats in that one joke about prayer and god helping those who help themselves). And being oblivious to the telltale signs your girl’s getting some strange is a crime of ignorance punishable by the rules of relationship Darwinism. Too stupid to act on suspicions? Prepare to get effed in the face with the infidelity dong. And maybe some gonorrhea too.
Also – we’re forgetting one other important piece of info here.
This happened at a game where people get drunk and act dumb.
What if Nosey-pants misread lovergirl’s text exchanging during his snoopery?
In the end, I say: mind your business. Only say something if you “happen” to see something. But don’t strain your eyes all double-0-spy-fan at a game. Much like a paranormal camera crew looking for ghosts, if you’re looking for drama, you’re probably going to find it. Even if it’s not there. And if it is, you’ll likely ruin a few lives – some of which haven’t even been born yet. Besides – we all know what happened to Lumpy Space Princess when she started some soap opera ass drama and not minding her bizz with those slutty wolves…
Whatever the rest of the story is, I hope the dude does the right thing.
‘cause the only lump that matters in this tale is the one about to pop outta that chunky iphone hussy.