This short-story idea came to me recently. I don’t take it terribly seriously (as you can probably tell by my Disney media additions), but I thought about actually writing it more as I’ve had trouble changing some bad habits that were leading me into a cyclical distress abyss (BTW that’s my real definition of Hell – feeling all trapped in miserable machinations of our own making). And while I watch.. Read More
…paved with Platitudes
Two men worked on a roadway, paving a path soon to be inundated with traffic. They toiled away diligently in silence and sweating in the uncharacteristically blistering heat, given the time of year. And although the sun was already beginning to set, the heat seemed to keep increasing the more they accomplished and the further along they got. In their effort to focus on the task at hand, neither had.. Read More
It’s been 10 years since Eternal Sunshine came out…
Dude. Eternal Sunshine came out a decade ago. "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" was released 10 years ago today http://t.co/LXWTeJ1J1j pic.twitter.com/KF8fyLTegA — Huffington Post (@HuffingtonPost) March 19, 2014 Yet they still haven’t perfected the technology from it for me yet. Or have they? F’real though. Talk about synchronicity (or coincidence – whatever): I was just thinking about this movie today and wondering what kind of effect a procedure like.. Read More
Performance art? LolWut?
Recently, I was enjoying Starbucks with a friend and talking about whatever people discuss at 5 AM between taking selfies and wishing they were still asleep. Somehow, the conversation switched to Marina Abromavic (by somehow, I mean I brought it up, likely out of nowhere) and proceeded to do the whole triple-fail-spectacular where I ask: “Do you know who she is?” and each follow up inuquiry leads to an exponentially.. Read More
That moment when smut’s milder than making out
So, Vice did this thing where they got a bunch of strangers off the streets of England to kiss each other for like 30 seconds: They aren’t British actors or supermodels, ya know? Just regular old plebeian Jane Does and Joe Schmoes abducted from their nice meals of shepherd’s pie to knock Buscemi teeth together in front of a white screen. That was stereotypically racist and I retract it 100%… Read More
Social hacks: improffice-ational art of “Yes, and”
Youtube must be psychic. Or listening in on my phone calls. I was just having this conversation last night – about how easy it is in a high-stress profession to look at everything and see “what’s wrong?” or “what needs fixing?” I mean, analytical thinking is totally crucial for critical fields like healthcare – but back when I was working there, it took me a long time to learn the.. Read More
Digital Drugs! Eat These With Your Ears
When I was younger, I thought my dad was nuts. Don’t get me wrong – I still do (it provides at least one half of the explanation for why I am), but I used to especially think it was nuts when he’d put on these special headphones meant to cancel out environmental sounds via white noise. They were huge and goofy and even though he got them to wear on.. Read More
For You From Me: Springtime Ear Candy
Last month, my computer caught syphilis and bit the dust. Then, like Jesus, it came back to me in a few days. Also like Jesus, it was thusly put to use instantly for purposes other than that for which it was intended. Namely, music listening. That’s not that bad really – but what is a travesty is that my itunes assimilation is now fkkd four ways to Friday (is that.. Read More
Creepy Canine: Top 10 Ways Your Dog’s A Horror-Show
Alright, you asked for it. Actually, nobody asked for this. (How weird would it be if somebody actually requested a list like this? Isn’t it weird enough that I made one up?) Okay. Here goes. Top 10 ways the senior canine you care for is not a far cry from a classic horror flick: 1. EXORCIST She walks up to you from the other room (on all fours, of course).. Read More
#TBT Instagram: A Fluffy Doggy Tale
Today we celebrate #TBT with the summertime tale of Treat and Creature: Try as he might, Treat saw no escape. He had surveyed the immediate surroundings, but was cornered on all sides by padded pink walls. Now, he stood stoically as Creature secured him with one claw alone – rendering him completely immobile. She paused pensively for a moment, looked up at the Human (who had trafficked him here with.. Read More